The 5 Items You Shouldn’t Travel Without….Kind Of.

There are a lot of blogs written by people living in foreign lands or travelling to different countries that have helpful posts to advise less experience travellers. It also helps rack up the views to your site which is what I am aiming to do now with my own top 5 tips of things you shouldn’t travel without.

1. Your passport.

passports
A Selection of Passports!

This one may come as a surprise but you try to leave or enter countries without one and you’ll find your trip very, very, very hard to complete, some experts would even say that it is impossible to travel abroad (legally) without one. Passports come in all shapes and sizes from the standard size and shape like the ones pictured above to the more original ones such as the passport for residents of the Philippines which is a fish shoved tail first into a sock

2. A mode of transport.

This tip is ideal for going places that are a bit too far to walk. Many things are modes of transport such as planes, horses and tanks.

army_tank
The Safest Way To Travel

3. A conscious brain.

Some people would argue that a conscious brain isn’t imperative for travelling and they are entitled to their opinion. Life is all about opinions and free speech, it is a human right that many of us enjoy but some people abuse this right and the rest of us have to listen to their constant whining about how the world is going down the drain pipe because they remade the film Ghostbusters but with an all female cast – guys, it doesn’t matter. If you do not have a conscious brain you are not travelling, you are being moved.

Senior Woman Calling Ambulance
You Tell Me If This Lady Is Travelling!

4. The ability to talk about your travels and about yourself constantly to anyone.

If you don’t have people to tell about your travels is there any real point in doing so? It’s like that famous saying, ‘If a tree falls in the woods, who is still buying Scampi Fries, they taste awful!’ You must talk constantly about where you have been and that little restaurant you discovered that was off the beaten track and only had three chairs in it and the chef was blind but knew how to tell what the ingredients were by touching them with his feet and when you were served your food it came out on a wooden plank of unvarnished teak. Then you must go on and on about how the beaches are becoming overused because too many people are going to the little island that you found a year ago while you were out canoeing with just the shell of a turtle and an iPad for a paddle. This is essential.

talking.jpg
A Lovely Chat About Your Travels Will Bring People Together

5. Ice Cubes

Ice cubes have multiple uses, you can put them in a sock and rest it next to your face if you have been punched in the face (we’ve all been there haha), you can place them in your drink when you are in countries with bad sanitation and therefore water that gives you uncontrollable bowel movements (we’ve all been there haha), you can use them to make ice sculptures to impress the customs officer at passport control in Uzbekistan (we’ve all been there haha), but take my advice and don’t try to sculpt an elephant riding a skateboard on a train track while holding a selection of plug extension cables in its trunk, it’s just too ambitious, you idiot.

In many countries you are travelling to the ice cubes will melt really quickly if left out in room temperature so make sure you carry a fridge and a source of electricity to help power said fridge.

water
Water Before It Melts

So there we go, 5 top tips to help you travel and for me to get more hits for my blog.

Please like or share if you know of someone who is travelling soon.

Thank you for reading.

4 Comments Add yours

  1. DoMoreBeMore says:

    Hahaha well I can definitely see your old life shining through in this post! Even your pics cracked me up! Definitely some “sound” advice 😉 PS How much is a tank ride in Thailand? – would love to do one of those ;P

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha, I don’t know but I don’t think it’s cheap 😄. Thanks, it’s good to let go and just write silly stuff – it’s kind of what I’m best at! They’ll be some more of the same at some point.

      Like

      1. DoMoreBeMore says:

        So maybe a tuk tuk then? Just not as safe! I think the last tuk tuk I went in had a wood floor with holes where you could see the road underneath LOL Can’t wait to read more 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      2. That sounds like a safe way to travel 😂 I’ve only been in a tuk tuk once and it was enough for me 🥴😳

        Like

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